[:en]32 Funny Quotes to Make a Joyful Day[:]
Funny quotes do bring you a joyful day just with some simple words. Check the post out and find some funny quotes to spice up everyday.
There was a spider. It’s gone now.
If people are talking about you behind your back. Then just fart!
Of course women don’t work as hard as men…
They get it right the first time.
I’m not crazy. I’m just special!!
Maybe I’m crazy.
I have to talk to myself about this, hold on…
Some people are like slinkies not really good for much, but bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.
I hate when I’m trying to pull the blankets up and I punch myself in the face.
What I feel like when I run…
What I’m pretty sure I actually look like…
If you say you’re cooler than me…
Does that make me hotter than you?
Don’t judge me. I was born to be awesome not perfect.
Mom, what’s it like to have the greatest daughter in the world?
I don’t know dear… You’ll have to ask grandma.
Teachers be like I’m just gonna wait til it’s quiet…
OMG! Slow down!
Yer gonna get us killed
I saw a carrot. This big, no lie.
Haters gonna hate.
Life is not a fairy tale.
If you lose a shoe at midnight, you’re drunk.
Chocolate comes from cocoa, which is a tree that makes it a plant. Chocolate is salad.
Home alone. Someone knocks at the door.
When you really want to slap someone, do it and say ‘mosquito’.
I can’t get out of bed… These blackets have accepted me as one of their own and if I leave now I might lose their trust.
Some people just need a high-five in the face with a chair.
When a woman says What? It’s not because she didn’t hear you. She’s giving you a chance to change what you said.
Me? Crazy? I should get down off this unicorn and slap you.
when I’m eating my salad and someone brings dounuts
Sorry honey, sarcasm falls out of my mouth, just like stupid falls from yours.
If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks…
Why is there a light in the fridge?
There is no angry way to say bubbles.
I don’t run. And if you ever see me running, you should run too because something is probably chasing me.
Did you just fall?
No. I attacked the floor.
I’m freaking talented!
Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably crap.
They said I could be anything, so I became a panda.
I don’t pretend to be anything I am not…
Except for sober, I’ve pretended to be sober a few times.
I tried to act normal, ‘worst 5 minutes’ of my life.
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